Before The Snow A Fangirl Fan Fiction
by Megatrxnical
Summary: { Reagan X Levi } Reagan wondered what had happened to them. If only she hadn't cheated on him. Now she was left thinking of what-might-have-beens. But what /had/ happened? Before they'd moved to University? Before Cath appeared on the scene? Before Snow? This is the story of Reagan and Levi's respective first loves.


** * I OWN NONE OF THE CHARACTERS, NOR FANGIRL, THEY ALL BELONG TO RAINBOW ROWELL**

_[ *A/N; I love Cath, and CathXLevi are my favourites (I promise), but I thought a Reagan X Levi story would be interesting. Also sorry that this one is so short, this is just the introductory chapter ;_; This will have sexual scenes later on, so this will be rated MA. ]_

Reagan was glad of the peace and quiet. She was actually glad that Cath had gone out to meet Levi. Usually, it was she who had to evacuate the room. She hated their close-ness, their guarded displays of affection, toning it down purposely in front of her. The fact she knew they were doing so, on her behalf, made her chest ache even worse. They pitied her. And they were right to, because she _was _jealous, even if the relationship between her and Levi had been over a good while. But it hadn't really had it? (Maybe for Levi, sure. But not for Reagan.) How was she supposed to believe that they were over, if he was constantly hanging around her, always in her room, always waiting outside the door, when Cather - being the stubborn, geek that she was; traits Reagan found both adorable and frustrating - would not let him in, because she was typing up the next chapter in her Simon Snow story, or whatever it was she spent all her hours doing on that battered old laptop of hers.

That's why she'd insisted they have ground rules - Her and Cath. Because she knew without them, she would turn into a jealous bitch. They were more for Cath's sake than her own, she told herself, repeatedly, but she knew this wasn't true. They were for her. Because while she'd been seeing different guys the whole semester - she would need two hands to count the number - and occasionally bringing them back to her room, when Cath was away visiting her head-case of a dad, Levi was the only person she'd ever really fallen for. He was the one. And she'd thought they'd get back together one day. She thought, her and Levi, they were meant to be.

Scrambling off her bed, she grabbed a notebook. She preferred the old-fashioned way of writing, to typing on a lit up screen. That hurt her eyes. Paper could never do so. She plucked her favourite pen from her desk drawer. She used it to study. Study with Levi. The flashcards lay in a heap on the floor, they'd not been used for weeks. Since those two had started dating. Reagan didn't feel the need to study anymore. She was surprised actually, as she stared at them, some quotes, some french words she'd remembered from class all littered there, that Cath hadn't taken the initiative to clean them up yet. Because she wasn't going to. She was far too busy staying out of the room, to care what it looked like inside.

Jumping back onto her bed, the soft warmth of the duvet comforting, the springs of the mattress altering to match her shape - maybe her mother had been right about the new mattress, if not the couch - as she sank gratefully back in, trying to get comfortable. Then, putting pen to paper. God, her writing was awful. Just a messy scrawl. But still. She had to have this down on paper, for it to be real. For her to abide by the rules, she had to believe the reasoning behind them, she had to know, to feel it, well and truly believe that she and Levi were over. She hated that word, over. She didn't want her and Levi to be finished, just as much as Cath didn't want to Baz and Simon and the story that was practically life, to finish. She was as much attached to this real-life guy, this Levi, this guy who shined so brightly, he never failed to light up even the darkest of rooms, as Cath was to her fictional ones.

**1. Nobody Talks To Me About Sex.**

**2. No Lovey-Dovey stuff in-front of me.**

**3. No-one talks to me about their relationships.**

**4. Levi is my friend, and you can't be un-necessarily jealous of that.**

**5. * No being a jealous, narcissistic bitch who gets off on her ex-boyfriend's attention. ***

The last in the list, was Cath's addition, and Reagan had only added it begrudgingly because she did like the girl, as much as she didn't like the situation they'd been placed in. Curse Levi, curse his damn good looks, and his winning smile and—. But it was her fault they'd ended wasn't it? She couldn't blame him for the rest of her life, she was the one who had cheated. But he was the one that was so irresistible that it was impossible to her to get over him completely.

**"Fuck you, Levi."** she muttered, her breath shaky, thin, weak sounding. Not Reagan sounding. Not strong, powerful, without a care in the world, for he was the only one who could make her feel like this. Scrunching up the piece of paper in her hands she threw it as far away as she could possibly throw it, fuck the rules, she would be as narcissistic as she wanted to be, she was still in love with him, she had been there first, she had all the right to 'get-off' as often as she wanted on her ex-boyfriend's attention.

The paper bounced off the door, just as it swung open, and landed right in front of him. Him. Levi. Her heart seemed to drop to her stomach - Cath was right, with Levi it was always the stomach, that took the blows - and she made to get up when she thought otherwise. **"Cath's not in."** her voice was disinterested, and flat. She was moody and certainly not in the mood to talk with him.

_"I know. I wanted to talk to you._**"**He lifted an eyebrow, running a hand through his hair - did he have to do that all the time, it was so.. distracting - before spotting the ball of paper at his feet.

_"Oh. What's this?" _He picked it up and un-scrunched it, frowning. He couldn't make it out, she knew that much for sure. He could read bits - probably words he recognised like 'sex' - but her writing was messy she was sure even Cather wouldn't be able to read it properly. _"Read it to me."_

**"But it's not important"**

_"It looks like a set of rules."_

**"It has nothing to do with you."**

_"It looks like it has everything to do with me, Rae."_

Reagan wished she was anywhere but here, but he smiled, and hesitantly, as he sat she complied.

**"Don't get mad."**


End file.
